


meltdown eta? Imminent

by orphan_account



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Ableism, Angst, Anxiety, Autism, Autistic Angus McDonald, Gen, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Stimming, forced repression of stimming, hurt/ comfort, implied/ referenced child abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:42:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25575256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Angus is having trouble with a new spell. He knew exactly how his parents would react to this failure and Taako’s patience had to run out eventually
Relationships: Angus McDonald & Taako
Comments: 11
Kudos: 119





	meltdown eta? Imminent

Angus cherished Taako’s magic lessons; they were one of the only scraps of proof that Tres Horny Boys didn’t hate him. If Taako could handle being around him for a whole hour every day then he can’t actually hate him as much as he said he did!

The words still stung (too reminiscent of school yard bullies and angry parents) but he knew he deserved them. He couldn’t expect someone as amazing as ‘Taako from TV’ to handle him and all his annoying habits without complaint, even his parents couldn’t do that.

They had been practicing magic for 3 weeks and 2 days when they came across the first roadblock, a spell Angus couldn’t do.

The words stuck in his throat (too many hard ‘s’ sounds, his lisp had been fixed when he was little but it was still hard sometimes).

He could feel Taako’s frustration grow with every failed attempt. Angus had never been good at reading emotions or social cues but anger was something he learnt to pick up on.

Years of dealing with his mother’s mood swings and his father’s violence trained his eyes to pick up on the slightest hint of rage.

“Try again, little man.” His voice was soft but there was a thinly veiled annoyance there that set Angus’ heart a race. He knew what happened when adults got mad, when they stopped pretending to be patient.

_ (The familiar thwip, thwip of his father’s belt on his back, it wasn’t the buckle this time thank god. His cheek still stung from his mother’s ring meeting it with a slap. Apologies bubbled. He was sorry. He didn’t mean to track mud, or stumble over his words. He was sorry. He was) _

He tried the words again. Wand raised in a trembling hand but nothing happened. He tried again, desperation growing. He couldn’t make Taako mad. Couldn’t let him down.

Nothing. Not even a wisp of smoke or flash of light. Angus’ heart dropped to his stomach.

Then an angry sigh so similar to the disappointment of his mother. It was too much.

In that second he was back home. Back in his father’s study, back burning as his father recounted every single one of his mistakes. Failure to make eye contact, incapable of talking properly and the annoying fiddling (he had researched it in the library and found it was called stimming.)

_ “Angus, why can’t you just be  _ **_normal_ ** _?” _

He could feel his breaths grow sharp, feel his body huddle and push itself into the corner but all he knew was  _ danger, fear, pain pain pain. _

“-m sorry. I’m trying, I really am. I’m really really s-sorry. I’m just stupid and annoying and so so stupid.” The boy detective knew begging made things worse but he could never stop himself.

The floor of study was wood but  _ that’s not right _ because he could feel stone under his hand and that voice wasn’t his father.

The voice was soft, a calming melody of comfort. He couldn’t make out words but he knew they weren’t angry. No one told him off with such a kind tone.

By the time his vision cleared and his breathing didn’t feel like he had just run a marathon Angus was exhausted. Not too exhausted to be embarrassed though.

Taako was kneeling in front of him, expensive skirt touching the dusty floor and Angus knew that under any other circumstances Taako would be complaining up a storm.

“Angus, my boy, are you with me now?” No response, words stuck in his throat like glue “chico, I need verbal confirmation.”

Angus nodded before opening his mouth to answer. Words didn’t come out only a small sob. And then the boy was crying, fat tears rolling down plump cheeks and nose crinkled in a way Taako  _ definitely  _ didn’t find endearing.

“‘M so sorr’ sir.” He managed four slurred words before the tears became too much to talk through.

Taako wrapped him in a hug. Skinny arms enveloping the shaking, sobbing boy as if to shield him from the world.

“Please don’t apologise.” Taako paused, his life hadn’t made admitting mistakes easy “I was having a bad day and took it out on you.”

Angus shook his head, hands coming up to yank on curly hair. They spent the hour like that, Taako muttering comforts as Angus began to slow his tears.

The floor was cold and hard but it didn’t matter not when Angus was cuddled in warmth of his teacher’s arms in his new home on the moon.

Angus was 10 years old and the world’s best detective but he was also 8 and bleeding on the floor and 6, sobbing into his pillow. He was Angus McDonald and his parents were a part of him but they didn’t matter not when Taako and Magnus and Merle and Lucreatia were all parts of him as well.

  
  
  
  
  
  



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